Pre-Uni fears...

I haven't blogged about anything useful in ages... I wrote some reviews, but honestly, that was just to 'post' something. Time for a change!


As I wrote somewhere earlier, I am going to attend University. Normally I will apply next week and everything will be official, but honestly, I'm a little scared.
Beside going to University I am also going to follow an evening course about everything to do with horses and running a business with horses. I wanted to do that for a long time already, just because I want to learn more. Some friends of mine are going to do it and I'm tagging along. The first course will be two time a week, the second once a week, if I'm not, mistaking.

I'm afraid I'm taking on more then I can handle. Especially because I have to learn to study early, to organise everything school related. I'm used to learn on the last possible moment and my school stuff was never structured. I hope I will have some free time left to go to my horse and game a few hours a week, but I don't think that is going to happen. Especially the gaming.

I know I can just give up the evening course if it gets to hard, but I know I will be jealous because my friends will finish it successfully and I didn't. It sounds really silly, but I know myself (I think!). The evening course is also a great opportunity to spend some time with my horse friends.

Another thing that concerns me a bit is that I am so shy and not really social... so I'm afraid I end up not making friends at school (University that is). In the last four years or so I had one person in school I actually called a friend, more then a schoolmate. I don't need fifteen people or so, one or two is fine. But I'm anxious about the whole social part already... and It's still more then a month away. How pathetic.

Another problem is money. Right now I am being supported by the state because I am unemployed. Starting from October, I will lose my source of income. How the hell am I going to pay for stuff? For clothes, shoes, school stuff, pay for horse riding lessons (if I ever find the time). I thought about taking a job, but I don't think I'm going to have the time!

As you can read, I am very very nervous about going back to school. About going to the BIG school.

I suppose I'll manage in some kind of way. I've always managed. At least I don't have to get a room.  I hate being away from everyone and having to cook everyday just for myself. 

So far the rant... feel free to leave tips and tricks or something...